Day 1

Well, I have been challenged to start journaling daily in my "freshman boot-camp" class through Crusade. I figure, I might as well blog most days (if not all) just because typing is easier for me. There is a lot running through my head right now so I'm going to try to just focus on a few things. One of the most recent things that I have been struggling with and praying about is the direction of my life. Currently I'm studying Mechanical Engineering. Back when I was searching for colleges, I applied for three totally different schools and got accepted to all three. One school was a focus of auto technician, youth pastor/ things of that nature and engineering. Now, I know that God led me t pick Michigan Tech as the school of choice, but I'm really starting to doubt engineering. I'm struggling with the math aspect of it, and if you know anything about engineering, it's four full years of tough math. Yet, I don't want to "give up" because it's too hard, but is engineering something that I really want to do? That's the problem, I have no idea what kind of career I would like to have. Also, I currently do not know where God wants me to be. At first, this was hard to handle. I started to freak out, I felt that I HAVE to know what's going on. But really, as much as I think that I'm in control of my life, I'm not. Sure, my actions will have an affect, but it is up to God as to how those actions get carried out. I feel like I'm at an intersection with 10 different ways to go. One of them is possibly going into the mission field.

A couple days ago I was praying to God that he would reveal his will for me. Well, immediately, I came across a site, Gospel for Asia. Wow. I love to serve, no doubt about it, but am I willing to give up everything, and spread the word in a foreign country? Tonight, I went to a concert, African Children's Choir, and I get that feeling of "Is this what you want me to do?" When do we get to that point when we really know where God is leading us? That's where I'm at now.